Family conflict is inherently dramatic.
This is according to one dictionary that defines drama as “any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting, or striking interest or results, e.g. the drama of a murder trial.”
The dictionary might as well have used parent-adult child estrangement as an example of drama, since it entails the elements mentioned above.
In this episode, Tina reminds us that most dramas involve heroes and villains. But in parent-adult child estrangement, that dichotomy presents parents with an obvious problem.
If the parent (as the rejected party) is the hero, then they must live with the notion that they raised a villain or villains.
But if the estranged adult child is the hero, then the parent must make sense of how his best efforts to parent well, including the sacrifices he made, landed him in the villain role.
As a matter of expediency, Tina suggests refusing to view the situation in black-and-white terms.
For practical tips on how to repair estranged relationships with adult children and their spouses or partners, see Tina’s book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child.
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