Blog Posts

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Basics

Handling Complaints from Your Estranged Adult Child

If you manage to open communication with your estranged adult child, you’ll need to be prepared for the crucial task of receiving complaints. Unless you have a conscious plan for your response, the rift could easily widen. Because the way parents handle complaints makes the estrangement either better or worse. Here’s what you need to

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Anxiety

Feeling Insecure in Relationships

I don’t always share my relationship-themed PsychologyToday.com posts with estranged parents. Often they’re just not relevant to this audience. But today’s post struck me as being maybe a little bit more interesting, at least to some parents. Several Reconnection Club members have been talking in our forums about relationships in general.  They’re sharing that they

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Basics

Podcast Interview Re: Estrangement

I recently had the pleasure of speaking with Las Vegas-based therapist Lourdes Viado. Lourdes hosts a podcast called “Women in Depth,” and she invited me to do an interview about my book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Lourdes is a thoughtful interviewer. In this conversation, she highlighted some of the most important aspects of

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Causes of estrangement

What If Your Estranged Adult Child Just Doesn’t Like You?

Over the years, I’ve heard more than one parent express the concern that their estranged adult child doesn’t have reason to reconcile, because they don’t even like the parent in the first place. Recently, one of our Reconnection Club members posed this question in our forums: If your estranged adult child doesn’t like you, is

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Free Help Locating Relatives

You may be familiar with Tom Martin, P.I., from our recent interview about locating your estranged adult child. (Reconnection Club members can click here to read the transcript.) If so, you already know that as a private investigator, Tom has a website you can use to try to find an adult child, or any missing relative,

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Adoption

Was Your Estranged Adult Child Adopted?

Adoption adds complexity to parent-adult child estrangement One of the most important tasks for parents estranged from adult children is to understand their children’s reasons for creating distance. Until parents can put themselves in their children’s shoes and see things as they do, it’s almost impossible for them to make the repairs that are usually

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Family dynamics

Help! My Husband’s Adult Children Don’t Talk to Him

Your husband’s adult child or children aren’t talking to him, and he’s obviously in pain about it. Maybe it’s been years since they last saw each other. Your heart aches for your spouse. The months keep rolling by, and nothing changes. He doesn’t know what to do… So you went online and found this article,

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Criticism as connection?
Communication

Criticism as a Form of Connection

Imagine you and a friend are climbing a mountain together. Your friend has just hauled himself up to the next level, and you want him to pull you up. So you say, “Give me your hand.” If your friend extends a rope for you to grab instead of his hand, will you take it? What

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Don't rush to reconcile
Reconciliation

Being in a Hurry Can Delay Reconciliation

Have you ever stood at the sink with a large pot in your hands, waiting for it to fill with water from the tap? Even if the water’s turned all the way on, it can take a frustratingly long time for the pot to fill. Estrangements are frustrating in the same way. “What’s taking so

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