The need for this kind of perspective-taking was highlighted by a study recently published in the journal Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice.
According to this article, the study found that almost 80% of estranged mothers believed their adult children’s estrangement to be caused by either a third party or the adult child’s mental health status.
Combined with existing research into people’s reasons for cutting off parents, this finding highlights a stark contrast in how mothers and adult children think about estrangement. (No word here on how dads think about estrangement, unfortunately.)
The practical takeaway is that there may be issues to be addressed between yourself and your estranged adult child, that have nothing to do with other people or their mental health.
Even if these factors are involved, always look for ways to address possible relational difficulties inside the relationship you share with your adult child(ren).
Not only will doing so place you in a better position to make any needed repairs and get to reconciliation, it will focus your attention where your power lies.
For ideas on identifying and making any needed repairs, please see Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child.