Newsletter Archive

This is the archive of featured newsletter articles, with the newest at the top.

Browse by topic using the categories to the right (or at the bottom of the page if you’re on your phone).

Personal growth

Reconnect With Yourself First for Best Results

Here in the U.S., we’re celebrating Independence Day this week. And while you may be thinking about your child’s “independent” decision to cut ties with you, I’d like to talk about your independence. Actually, independence is just one aspect of a developmental process called individuation, which you may have heard me talk about with regard

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Contact

Coping with Inconsistent Contact

If you have any contact with your child at all, you might feel dismayed at how inconsistent it is. You may be in the post-reconciliation phase, when you hoped everything would be fine again. Or their inconsistency might be part of an on-again, off-again cycle of “now you see me, now you don’t,” and reconciliation

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Birthdays

Mothers Day / Fathers Day Survival Guide

NOTE: Prefer listening to reading? Listen now to the Reconnection Club Podcast audio adaptation of this article. It’s Episode #36: Four Steps to a Better Mothers Day. *   *   * Mothers Day and Fathers Day are just around the corner, causing anticipation, hope and dread for estranged parents everywhere. Most of those parents won’t hear

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Family dynamics

Being Best Friends Could Cause Trouble Later

If you prefer listening to reading, we have a Reconnection Club Podcast episode on this topic. Check out Episode 34: Was Your Child Your Best Friend?  *   *   * Were you and your child ever best friends? It happens a lot in single-parent families that the child gets “promoted” by circumstances to friend, partner, and

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Basics

Emotional Estrangement

Do you prefer listening to reading? Listen to an audio version of this article: Reconnection Club Podcast Episode 49: Emotional Estrangement  *   *   * Parents sometimes ask me, “My child talks to me, but I don’t feel comfortable with him; are we estranged?” This article is my response. If you’re in touch with your child,

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Body-mind connection

Why We Act Impulsively (And How Not To)

Do you prefer listening to reading? Listen to an audio version of this article here: Reconnection Club Podcast Episode 35  *   *   * I recently attended a 2-day training with J. Eric Gentry, an expert on trauma and grief. During the training, I found myself thinking about what Dr. Gentry called “the threat response” and how

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Communication

Seek First to Understand

NOTE: If you prefer listening to reading, check out the Reconnection Club Podcast Episode #41, Seek First to Understand. One of the most powerful maxims in human relations theory is this pithy advice from Stephen R. Covey: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” Covey himself called it “the single most important principle” in

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Gifts

Healthy Giving

Healthy giving has boundaries and respects the wishes of the recipient. It can be challenging to give from a place of pure generosity, especially when you’re not at your best. Read on for examples of how to give in a healthy way this season. In last month’s newsletter, I wrote about the dangers of giving too much

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Unwanted gift
Birthdays

Thankless Giving

[Do you prefer listening to reading? This article was adapted for audio in Episode 10 of The Reconnection Club Podcast: 5 Reasons Not to Send Gifts to an Estranged Adult Child] Here in the U.S., Thanksgiving Day will soon be upon us. It’s supposed to be a time for gratitude … Yet many estranged parents,

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